Dating Etiquette: Things You Didn't Know are Killing the Mood
You asked her out on a date, she said yes. You went out and had fun. You were funny, charming, the quintessential gentleman, and dressed nicely. You thought that the first date went perfect-at least that's how you looked at it. But there's one problem: she hasn't called you back since or isn't replying to you on Facebook.
First dates are already a big challenge for us guys, given all the awkward moments, uncomfortable silences, and fake smiles you're trying to put on even though you're obviously sweating like a pig. Throw in some deal breakers and mood killers, however, and the entire night can turn out a bust.
Make sure you make it past date #1; here are a few things you might want to avoid doing as the night goes on:
Have her Pay for Any Part of the Date
To split or not to split? That is the question.
Yes, times have changed and the ladies and the gentlemen are treated more equally nowadays, but on first dates, it's the guy who should pay.
While both of you may do the "check dance"-where one of you insist on paying the bill, or at least split it, and you end up with a tug of war with the bill-the whole date should still be on the guy.
While others may see this bill dilemma as meaningless, at least on your part, it shows you're invested in the process; that you want to spend the money because you're looking for a real relationship. You invited her out, so going Dutch is not an option.
Not Planning in Advance
Being spontaneous is great and all, but only in the right situations. If you ask a girl out, at least have some kind of plan in mind. It's always polite and reassuring for the ladies to ask a few days ahead.
Also, for future dates, avoid doing the same things over and over again. Sure, she might have loved the restaurant or the club you went to on your first date, but be more creative. There are always a lot of non-cliche things to do on a date.
Ignoring her for a Game
Even if it's the NBA playoffs or the World Cup, you're still not allowed to tune out on her. Ignoring your date implies that the game is more important for you than her.
You asked her out to spend time with her, not to have an audience while you watch the game.
If you really must watch the game during a date, at least acknowledge her and say something along the lines of "Hey, I'm so sorry, but can we talk at the next commercial/after this inning/halftime?" Though we're not sure if that'll even work, so it might be better to just focus on her.
Being More Engaged with Your Phone
Dates are a great way to get to know the girl you're interested in. That can only happen, however, if there's effective communication. Constantly checking your phone for messages, browsing your social media profiles, or taking calls during the date only ruins the conversation.
If you wanted to talk to your bros, you should've had a boys' night out instead of a date night. Even if she says she's okay with you sending a quick text, taking a quick call, or checking your Facebook, it's not.
Not Keeping the Conversation Going
We all know that most women are very verbal communicators. They talk a lot. When they're upset, however, they tend to clam up.
If you give her one-word responses, she'll likely assume that there's something wrong. She's not asking you to tell your whole life story or be the center of attention. Just keep in mind that a simple question like her asking how your day went could be her way of trying to connect.
Talking About Exes/Other Girls
Everybody has a past, and telling your date why you're single isn't necessarily a turnoff. But don't go on blabbing about your exes or past hookups. She doesn't want to hear about it.
Give your date some respect, and leave the guy talk for your bros.
Dress Like a Tambay
If you show up looking like a hobo (tambay sa kalye), or look like you just got out of bed, she'll probably beg off of future meet-ups. It takes only a few minutes to put on something nice; trust that she will go through the trouble of dressing u, so you should, too.
Sure, the drinks may help calm you down and relieve you of the jitters, but go easy on the drink specials. If you get drunk even the slightest, odds are you'll get too sloppy or say/do something embarrassing. No one wants that.
Most girls can deal with some annoying things you do, but do you really want her to be the one adjusting to you just to make things work?
If you really want to make things work, you'll avoid these deal breakers and make sure every date will be special and memorable.